This morning at 4am, Ben and I shared some tired kisses, said a little prayer together, and snuggled for a few minutes longer than usual before he had to get up to go to work. Today is our three year wedding anniversary, and it’s the first time we won’t be together on the actual day of it to celebrate. Life looks a little different for us these days. Ben has his dream job as a firefighter and is gone a lot. He’ll be working quite a few other big holidays this year, and I’m slowly learning that it’s not about what day it is, it’s about making the time you have together really count.
I don’t have any profound thoughts on marriage to share. I actually had read and heard so much over the years before I got married that I thought things would be a lot harder than they are. Ben and I used to talk when we were dating and say, “Wait is marriage going to be really hard? Because I mean I love you, and I like hanging out with you. Can it really be that bad?” Well three years in, I will say we have had our fair share of hard days, where big things come up, I end up a hot crying mess, and Ben is trying everything he can to for me to be ok. But by the end of it, we are back to our normal selves, and I’m rattling off some story about something I probably was in the middle of telling him when our fight started. When I look back over these last three years, what I remember is a lot of happy and a lot of laughing.
I’m not saying marriage is the easiest thing I’ve ever done. Anytime you put two people together in a relationship, friends, family, or marriage, it’s going to be hard. In marriage, you have two people with their own thoughts and ideas about life coming together as one. Of course it’s going to be messy some times. But it is also so rewarding and fulfilling. Being able to serve and sacrifice for someone in such a real, authentic way is something that you really never experience in anything besides a marriage. And if you have God at the center of it all, I believe it will be one of the greatest adventures of life.
I am so blessed to be married to such an incredible man with so much character. He really astounds me with his depth of character. Everyone who meets him immediately loves him, and to me that speaks volumes of who he is. I could go on and on about him but I will save that just for him. My one piece of advice for any girls (or guys) still not married is just not to settle. If you have things you want in your future wife/husband, don’t underestimate God’s desire to give you exactly what you want. He did all that and more for me. And every time we climb into bed together, I still feel like a giddy little girl because it doesn’t feel like real life getting to wake up with the man I always dreamed about.
With that, to the man who puts up with my dragging him out to do spontaneous photo shoots (like this one we did last night 😛 ), who listens to my incessant stories about people he doesn’t even know, who leaves me lipstick messages on the bathroom mirror, who knows that if I’m being a grump to send me on a run, who knows that if he includes coffee in the plans, I’ll do just about anything, who loves to get excited with me about my new outfits, but also tells me I’m beautiful in the morning when I’m in my jammies with my hair a mess, and to the man who teaches me more and more about God’s love everyday by the way he so selflessly loves me, here’s to a lifetime more with you, Benjamin. Happy anniversary!
We have some fun things planned over the next few weeks to celebrate but the main thing I’m looking forward to is a little getaway to San Fransisco the beginning of next month. I can’t wait to spend some time away together!
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